Lake Huron, PA (August 8, 2023) – Junior boy Kayde Kaplan, 10, has been stripped of his position as Camper Captain of the Blue Menthols due to a failed drug test administered after a tumultuous day of intense Camp Huron Lake Color War competition.  Kaplan had been a model camper and role model to bunkmates up until a member of the White Fish noticed Kaplan’s green urine in an unflushed bunk toilet. The disgraced leader claimed to have eaten several…

Lake Huron, PA (August 3, 2023) – As word spread through the sleepaway camp community yesterday afternoon that trunk delivery service Camp Trucking will cease operations immediately, camp directors were forced to scramble to figure out how, in fact, they will be returning their campers’ belongings in a little over one short week. After fielding hundreds of calls from furious parents, Camp Huron Lake Director Marty Feldstein and his camp administration held an emergency meeting that lasted well into the…

New York, NY (August 1, 2023) – Top forensics experts are being hired and retained for the entire summer by crazed camp parents leaving police precincts unable to investigate some of the summer’s most serious crimes.  The experts are raking in the cash for their seven-week stint scrutinizing every single detail of any picture posted on the camp website related in any way to their employer’s children.  Some of the forensics scientists have subcontracted private investigators as well as body…

Lake Huron, PA (July 27, 2023) – Camp Huron Lake’s Marty Feldstein hiring of Dr. Seuss as the Week 4 camp doctor turned out to be a mistake of near biblical proportions.  In an effort to avoid hiring a board certified physician whose child would then receive a tuition discount, Feldstein, for years has made egregious errors in an attempt to save a few bucks by employing other unqualified candidates such as world-renowned sexologist Dr. Ruth and Dr. Dre of…

Lake Huron, PA (July 25, 2023) – They descended on Camp Huron Lake like zombies in a post-apocalyptic war zone clad in tank tops and t-shirts, way too short jean shorts and designer sneakers.  They came carrying thousands upon thousands of bags filled with more crap than a port-a-potty after a hot dog eating contest.  They screamed their children’s names as they sprinted toward the bunks.  Yet all their kids saw was a scary swarm of confusion as hundreds of…