Non-Jewish Girl First to Win Camp Triathlon in 93 Years

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Huron Lake, PA (August 12, 2019) – For the first time in its nearly century-old history, Camp Huron Lake has crowned a non-Jewish female as its Color War Triathlon champion.  Like Joe DiMaggio’s 56 game hitting streak and the 1960’s Celtics’ eight straight titles, this record seemed unbreakable. Christin McFadden, a fourteen-year old camper from Wales and daughter of two former and just recently returned Huron Lake lifeguards, smoked the competition in the swimming, kayaking, and running event.

Despite arriving at camp two weeks later than her bunkmates due to the extended Welsh school calendar, McFadden needed only a few days of dry land kayak training in order to compete in the prestigious camp event.  With the entire camp watching the shores of beautiful Huron Lake, the Super Senior Girl took a thirty second lead after the half mile kayak portion then swam nearly quarter mile in Michael Phelps-esque fashion much to the delight of the Blue team, extending her lead to nearly two minutes. 

“Someone said she swims the English Channel twice a week.  I don’t doubt it. She’s 5’9” with not an ounce of fat on her,” remarked 5’1”bunkmate Melyssa Rosenstein, the division’s second tallest camper.  “She’s really sweet and everyone loves her but she was pretty pissed when her closest competition, Jen Weinberg, called her a ‘Wale’.  Jen is so dumb. She’s not a ‘Wale’, she’s Walsian.”

McFadden ran the eight tenths of a mile in equally impressive fashion and finished the race in record time.  Barely breathing above her normal respiratory rate, she asked the Triathlon official if she was required to do another round of each portion of the race all while being mobbed and cheered by members of the Blue team.  The Welsh specimen then cheered on the rest of the competitors as they made their ways across the finish line, provided them with water, then helped clean up the area while the rest of the camp proceeded to song rehearsal. 

Director Marty Feldstein had no idea the type of athlete Huron Lake was getting when McFadden arrived a few weeks back.  “She’s such a great kid and I know she can compete in the race next year if she comes back so we pretty much have two choices…not let her back next year or make her division too old to participate.  This streak was everything to us.  It’s a little embarrassing to tell the truth.  Out of thousands and thousands of campers who’ve come to Huron Lake in the past 93 years, the one kid who’s never eaten a latke or sat at a Seder table dominates the race.  Not at all surprising, but still embarrassing. ”

Tomorrow McFadden’s Blue teammates will have a nice relaxing morning off from competition while she takes on the Red team by herself in soccer, a game her parents noted she is average at compared to her classmates at home, just like swimming. 

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