“Greatest Visiting Day Ev-ah!” Honestly Just Kinda Average

Huron Lake, PA (July 23, 2018) – Based on a recent Facebook post from Danielle Lichtenstein, one would believe Visiting Day at Camp Huron Lake was possibly one of the best days of her forty-seven year life yet those close to her, including her immediate family, would most likely categorize the day as average to slightly above average.  Although her husband and in-laws also spent the full five hours mimicking nearly every move with her at Huron Lake, none of them could possibly remember anything that happened throughout the day that would make Mrs. Lichtenstein believe it was any better than the previous six Visiting Days.

From the moment they arrived on the shores of beautiful Huron Lake, their day could not have been more mundane and uneventful.  After being forced to park their car on the soccer field on the outskirts of camp, they were then pushed and shoved by several overzealous parents as they made their way to see Jaylyn, 14, and Jaydyn, 11, while Danielle’s in-laws lagged behind by about eighty yards with absolutely no clue where either granddaughter’s bunk was located.  Lichtenstein’s husband, Jon, received a lukewarm hug from Jaydyn who looked behind him to see if he brought any more bags in addition to the seven which were cutting off circulation to his fingers.

When they finally found her in-laws, the family made their way down to a six by four patch of grass at the overcrowded lakefront, they listened intently as the girls told the same exact boring stories that they told them during their multiple phone calls and numerous letters home.  While Jon’s parents took naps, Danielle and the girls grabbed the food from the identical barbecue lunch provided by the camp for the past two decades.  They then proceeded walk around the camp then met with the girls’ group leaders who told them how much their children were loved despite calling each by a completely generic nickname like “sweetie” and “honey”.   Upon returning to the lakefront an hour later, the girls were greeted by their recently awoken grandparents who were complaining about missing the free lunch and getting sun burnt while they slept.

The girls’ art projects that they worked on for the first four weeks of camp were both sorta okay although no one really knew what the heck they were, but certainly nothing to brag about even by grandparent standards.  Their beds had pretty much the same decorations as the year before so it was hard for anyone to even fake enthusiasm when seeing how they were adorned.  Even Rachyl Bergstein, Jaylyn’s bunk mate, was throwing up in the bathroom from eating too many AirHeads and micro designer cupcakes just as she had done in 2015 and 2017.

“I have to be honest.  It was a nice day and I loved seeing the kids but was it the greatest Visiting Day ever?  Not by a long shot.  Five hours is a long time, especially when the girls started fighting around hour three,” opined Jon.  “I thought last year’s when that hot stepmom in the skimpy bikini got tossed violating the camp’s one-piece bathing suit policy…that was the best Visiting Day ever!”